In the famous words of Bear Grylls or something to this effect, here are the rules of engagement when it come to bears. Bears can be like the line at Fat Tony's Pizza at 3am, so proceed with great caution. When being charged by a bear (they do this as a scare tactic), I have read in the manual, that you are to spend some time yelling at the bear while waving your hands in the air. Only do this arm waving and yelling if the bear sees you, otherwise you just rung the diner bell! If the bear does not see you, then get out of there without it seeing you, do not see this as a great photo op- Julia! Otherwise, you may want to establish an escape route, as Julia and I have done, we intend to throw ourselves off the hill outside our condo, we figure a broken leg is better than being whipped around like a human helicopter in the jaws of a mammoth of a bear or you could just fight like crazy, which is more than likely your answer. Lisa is that freaked out about bear encounters, that every black tree trump that comes in sight along the valley trail, she near knocks poor Julz flat and is a good 50 metres ahead which is one thing not to do, although if Lisa goes for the sprint, Julia and I might have half a chance.This information is imperative during this season, as 26 bears have already been sighted in Whistler, and one drunk man was pushed to the ground and swatted at by a bear at 2am last week, so I figure we are handy people to know if this were to occur. The above picture is of Samson the bear, the largest recorded bear in Whistler, just imagine that bad boy sneaking up on you when you're stumbling home in the early hours of the morning. Oh feck!
Our week has consisted of beers, pool and ice-hockey, all things that are bound to stir up some passion and provide a great ice-breaker with our new roommate. On that note we are moving into a hotel with 2 x hot tubs, pool & tennis court in a couple of weeks although we'll still be sharing a room and bed. These outing are perhaps more interesting than the game itself observing the Canadian culture surrounding the game, this is when you see how Canadians really live (ice-hockey+beer+pool+ no mercy). I now understand the phrase "he/she went all Canadian." What started at Cinnamon Bear playing pool, a deadly compliment to beer ended with another set back on the humiliation spectrum. Somewhere in the middle Julia had an intense dance off whipping out her newly established move of the grapevine in high tempo, I don't know where she'd been hiding this move (I've mentioned it before, you'd be surprised with how often someone challenges us to a dance off), I accidentally flung the pool cue into the back of a girl's head (potential drama- thank God she wasn't Canadian) and Lisa found herself on a bear hunt, luckily she was well educated, your welcome Patto! We should have signed the actual lease before we all got blind together, we're hoping we still have a place to move into after our performance. Oh cider, we can't even pin this one on you! Testimony to Julia's fortune cookie of acquiring higher intelligence, we woke up to the nice surprise of no glow paint after the glow party, this is certainly a rarity on a Monday morning although I did let the team down with waking up to a glow stick around my head, and to think we'd come so far- yep still a hazard!
The decision to host a house party so close to the end of a lease, against all rationale must have been made after a seasonal bender, you may as well throw your damage deposit to the wind. We went to a house party in Creekside, and by the time we got there the house was packed, people were flooding out the windows, they even had a proper DJ which apparently under no circumstances are you allowed to touch the 'wiki wiki disc.' And with the stereotypical American Pie party comes the hazardous crowd surfing. Be aware of people's limbs flailing above you with no signs of remorse. Also, don’t expect any sympathy when the heel of their gumboot flies into your bloody skull, or in my case I had a girl who may have been in denial about her size after the crowd were quick to surf her through with immense effort, just to keep her in the air, only to come down on me like a tone of bricks. You would think she’d be easy to spot, giving fair amount of time to ready your arms for unstoppable agony but no, I had a full figured torso slam me down at full force within a matter of seconds- something like this could only happen to one of us. It is times like this that you will be severely reminded of just how fragile your wrists are. A lesson learnt here, next time a body glides towards you, prepare yourself to punch and jab their rib cages without mercy, it's every man for himself out there. This douche act cut the night short as I had suffered a minor head injury, and the police had made an appearance shortly after the body slamming, shooing out the lost generation.
I'm sure we've missed many others things that have happened but since Lisa's arrival, it's been the blur that was!
Love
Lydia and Julia x
Our new home
After preaching the rules of engagement according to Bear Grylls, it was all thrown out the window when I actually saw a bear on the side of the road while I was on the bus. I near gave the stranger next to me a heart attack when I'd squealed at the sight. As soon as I walked in the door, I told the girls to get their runners as we're going on a bear hunt. We ran down to Nordic which is about a kilometre away, not exactly the walk around the corner that I lured the girls in with, we were sprinting so fast, I choked on mosquito. The bear was still there when we got there. It's moments like this that you would hope to draw on knowledge that you've acquired to be able to deal with certain types of situations, well, that's all good and well in theory but truth be told we were way too psyched about getting a photo near a bear that all that wasted bear reading was hours I'll never get back. As we were walking back, lo and behold, there is another bear on the side of the road, what are the chances?! After other spectators casually walked past the bear as if they hadn't even noticed this mammoth of a creature beside the road, we were still squealing about how to get around the bear, then moments later our friend Lexi comes out of nowhere in a car- what a savior!
Love
Lydia and Julia x
Our new home
No comments:
Post a Comment